An update on my CFIDS symptoms for 2010 as well as treatments I've
2010 was a tough year. But there was also
clarity and some successes.
One great empirical test came late in the year. I purchased a program which at the very
least was a form of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. At the most, it is a revolutionary method of spiritual
empowerment. It consists of using an 8 word key phrase, with 12 variations to be applied in appropriate
I found that it took me over two weeks of constant reading and repetition to finally memorize the
core (short) 8 words. The variations are still beyond my grasp.
Rather than be discouraged, I was intrigued by the process. Upon reflection, I realized
that this was a factor with which I struggled on a daily basis in a number of areas.
Whenever I have to learn a new mental task, I find that I have to try it over and over
(sometimes for months) before the action becomes possible.
I previously mentioned the torture of trying to cut and paste while taking the Howie Schwartz
Apprentice Course. I now realized that this was a constant in my daily life. So instead of denying it,
I kept alert to when a task would demand this intense period of learning.
Once I realize that I'm being impeded, I now set aside the time to keep trying, over and over and
over....(ad nauseum as they say) until I can incorporate the new skill. This is still a frustrating and
painful process, but at least there is hope.
It also shows a major source of frustration which has plagued me for years. Part
of me knows that a task is "easy". I am often at the point of tearing my hair out at my inability to
accomplish something that is so obviously simple. Of course, the frustration only adds to the problem,
and creates quite a few more problems.
I am now still frustrated, but have learned to spread out the learning curve. Goals with
timelines attached simply do not work. Small micro goals with simple accomplishment as the target help build
up my morale and keep unnecessary energy drains at minimum.
2010 had many other features. From a potential Annus Horribulus to New Hopes for a New
Future. But the above lesson will be the one I will remember (as far as my health and disability issues are